Now Backyard Barbeques Are Destroying The Planet – Leading German Alarmist Site Frets

The demonization of the outdoor barbecue has begun – expect it to be banned soon in our lifetime.

I like visiting the German alarmist websites. Among my favorites is klimaretter “climate rescuers”, a leading alarmist site run by a gaggle of tree-hugging, panic-spreading kooks who insist the end is near. They’re aligned with Joe Romm, Bill McKibben and other nutjobs. Stefan Rahmstorf donates money to them.

Today their entertainment did not disappoint me. Climate-rescuer contributor Georg Etscheit shares his experience and exasperation over a barbecue birthday party he was invited to by his barbecue-fan dentist – too much smoke, environmental destruction and fat!

For the environmentally and climatically obsessed Georg, all that the charcoal-burning and meat-eating is a “pyromaniacal ritual” that is intolerable and has to stop.

First he frets that in the future climate change will surely bring us many more days that will be ideal for having more environmentally destructive barbecues.

Next, he describes the set-up his meat-eating dentist had:

In his yard behind his dental practice, he had a pavilion set up for guests and his barbecue equipment was placed near it. The first thing that caught my eye was this voluminous casket-like appliance of US-American origin, a metal box with a huge cover for the charcoal. There’s an overheat feature that is supposed to be good for handling an entire pig. And such an animal was indeed lying on that casket, red, oozing and carved – a wretched picture. And I was supposed to eat that soon?”

But the cruelty that the poor pig frying on the grill had to endure was the least of his worries. Next he describes the dentist’s grill in more detail:

My barbecue-enthusiast dentist of course owned a luxurious barbecue grill, the kind you can buy at every home-center. Such a luxury grill-monster on wheels can easily cost several thousand euros. Sizzling on the grill, producing huge clouds of smoke, was an abundance of sausage and spare ribs. Then I noticed he also had a smaller spherical grill with a dozen grilled chickens going as well.”

Georg then complains about the all the smoke and grease, advising barbecue guests that it’s best to wear old clothing to barbecues because…

Smelly clouds of smoke are produced by the burning spare ribs and charred chicken, which are also drenched with artificial smoke-aroma barbecue sauces, all accompanied by mayonnaise-soaked egg, potato and pasta salads, which all surely leave fat and grease everywhere.”

How yukky! By now I can imagine poor Georg sitting as far away as possible, in some corner all by himself. He adds:

I don’t want to go further into detail. But for me it is clear that there is little to be desired from such pyromaniacal male rituals from the early times of the homo sapien sapiens. From a culinary perspective, invitations to barbecues are almost always a catastrophe, also health-wise because charred fat and meat in addition to the synthetically produced sauces and marinades are known to be extremely carcinogenic and very difficult to digest without huge quantities of pure alcohol.”

Well, alcohol does help. Next he describes the environmental and climatic impacts of barbecues:

Ecologically and from a climate perspective, barbecues are nothing but a disaster. Just the enormous quantities of meat at barbecues is completely unacceptable. Then there’s the charcoal, which is ecologically okay only if you look at it only on the surface. About two thirds of the 300,000 tons of charcoal burned in Germany every year by barbecue fans comes from the South American rain-forests. Most of the raw wood for this must be illegally cut.”

Again the rainforests. Georg then says that barbecues will take the planet to a tipping point:

Barbecue fans contribute to the destruction of the rain forests in three ways, and thus to climate change: First because of the soy production needed for producing huge amounts of meat. Secondly through the chopping of trees for producing charcoal. Moreover, this takes away an important source of fuel for the local people, who then in turn have to cut even more trees down. Now that rising temperatures are leading to a classic vicious circle whereby the number of summer evenings with”super barbecue weather” are rising, which in turn drives up demand for more charcoal, which leads to more deforestation  and so on.”

Has he never gone camping in the forest? I think Georg just needs more getting used to barbecues. Everybody invite Georg to your next barbecue: etscheit@gute-geschichten.de. I’m having one on August 25, and Georg you are invited to come.

 

22 responses to “Now Backyard Barbeques Are Destroying The Planet – Leading German Alarmist Site Frets”

  1. Ulrich Elkmann

    Poor Georg. Has no one told him that you have to ACT? Become an activist – get out a garden hose and spray the barbecue (and the smoke-contaminated guests) with generous loads of H2O (preferably unchlorinated) and you will never face the embarrassment of such an invitation again.

    1. DirkH

      If you REALLY want to end a barbecue you gotta use liquid oxygen
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjPxDOEdsX8

  2. Ed Caryl

    Most of his diatribe seems to be about the use of charcoal. Most backyard barbecues here in the states use propane. Much more economical and clean. I have a large barbecue. I use it at least once a week, even in the winter. One five-gallon tank of propane lasts me a year.

    The rest of his piece seems to be against a carnivorious lifestyle, or excess consumption, or largess. I detect a bit of envy.

    I would like to point out that the charcoal burners in the third world are just trying to make a living so that they can feed their families.

    The Greenies real slogan should be publicized widely – Poverty For Everyone!

  3. Rich

    With any luck Georg’s poor dentist will succeed in his strategy to keep Georg away from his barbecues. But maybe not. ‘Activists’ of every stamp seem to flock to the chance of a free lunch.

  4. Steve C

    How very disrespectful of dear Georg. Had he been a little more aware, he might have realised that this was, in fact, a religious meeting … of the Chiefio’s ‘Church of the Sacred Carbon’ …
    https://chiefio.wordpress.com/2012/07/21/church-of-the-sacred-carbon/

    Indeed, I’m performing a Wave Offering as I type this … 🙂

  5. DirkH

    A whole roasted suckling! (Spanferkel)
    He says “extremely carcinogenous and only digestable with large amounts of alcohol”.

    What a complete idiot.

    Currently I avoid carbohydrates and eat nearly only fiber, protein and fat, to a large degree animal fat+protein. I wanted to try this kind of diet. I’ve lost 3 kg in a month without exercising much.

    It seems like the body, when starved off carbohydrates, must run on fat metabolism and then it doesn’t make any difference whether it uses fat from food or stored fat from fat cells. You eat a Bratwurst without bread (but with mustard!) at noon and you simply don’t get hungry til evening… astonishing.

  6. dave ward

    I’m taking a risk here and sticking my head over the parapet. Even leaving the climate alarmism to one side, barbeques are a curse when you live in a built up area. Tonight, once more, the house is full of the stink of burning food wafting in from next door, and this happens several nights a week during the summer, ruining what would otherwise be the nicest time of the day. It really doesn’t matter whether the barbeque is charcoal fueled (and lit with paraffin briquettes) or the bottled gas variety, the net result is still the same. If I started a smoky fire of garden refuse I’m sure the complaints would roll in. It would be nice if the outdoor cooking brigade realised that not everyone enjoys their pursuit…

  7. George Alexander

    Georg sure knows how to ‘harsh a buzz’. I am not inviting him to my party.

    Say, DirkH. Sounds like you have gone Paleo. I have done the same myself. Never felt better. As they say: “Grok On!”

    1. DirkH

      Well, I’m lazy, and it’s not really paleo as I eat lots of cheese. But I was inspired by it. Should do more greens, though. Gotta work on it.

      I do lentils and beans regularly. Some carbohydrate in there but not too much, low glycemic index as well.

      Beans also have lots of phosphatidylserine; very good for the cell membranes.

      Add sesame or sesame oil to pulses; contains Methyonine, which lacks in pulses.

      1. Ed Caryl

        I’ve been on the same diet for the last month, also, Dirk. Mixed in 30 minutes a day on the treadmill. Lost 7 kg!

        1. DirkH

          Oh. Funny coincidence. I think some news article made me try it, maybe it was the same for you. So, good luck!

  8. BargHumer

    Off the subject, sorry, but does anyone know why the GWPF account has been suspended?

    1. Michael
    2. dave ward
  9. John F. Hultquist

    “ . . . and very difficult to digest without huge quantities of pure alcohol.”
    [Georg Etscheit, 2012]

    Give this man a Darwin Award!
    —————————————

    Also, see this post at Chiefio’s site:
    http://chiefio.wordpress.com/2012/07/21/church-of-the-sacred-carbon/

    The dentist is one of us.
    —————————————-

    Please, could you provide the address of the dentist’s home?

  10. PeterF

    do we know whether the dentist does take new patients?

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  12. AaronC

    Surely this person can find something better to do than to write such drivel (and actually mean it)! Many of the more hardcore enviros respect and admire the “indiginous peoples” of the world, including the USA’s native americans. Doesn’t he realize that they were cooking fat-dripping meat over a wood fire many centuries before this generous dentist did it?? Geez, what a pansy a–!

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